So the husband had some sort of affair to had thought of leaving our marriage. After couseling, after he said he didnt want to leave, we are trying to improve our communication skills which he has a hard problem with opening up, I have a hard time speaking up for myself, what are good communications questions, about anything, to help build a better relationship?
Your counselor should have supplied that kind of information. You really don't learn how to communicate with your spouse via YA ..
Communication skills 101.
"hi, i cheated". verbal communication:
this displays he didn't like what you were like, or found something that peaked his interest.
'he said he didn't want to leave' also the form of verbal communication: that means, either other chick was tied up with some other dude on the side, had extra baggage, or it got boring for him and you might make more money and support his butt better
Give him the middle finger : non-verbal communication
shows your smart enough to start over, Communicate to him that
"It Is Over" and re-start your life. you can do that either:
over the phone / via text / via slashed tires on car / or face to face.
{all the above mentioned forms are great ways to build your communication skills!!!}
i know communication is hard but what i suggest is to start doing things togethequestions to ask about communicationr make some couple time and take walks or date night or something in which conversation and communication can flow naturally. Also for the hard questions you should be able to ask him anything you want to know especially about the affair and he should answer honestly. next what you will have to come to terms with is if you believe he is telling you the truth and that you can watch his every move for the rest of your lives to:
Wife Questions:
What was it that our marriage was lacking that made you decide to cheat?
In what ways has our relationship changed from when we were first married?
Both:
Tell me something about you that you think I do not know.
In 5 years where do you see yourself and where do you see us?
What are some of your favorite TV shows and why?
What is your opinion on the current economical standing of the United States?
Tell me something about your family history.
What was your best remembered childhood experience?
What class were you good at in school? Why did you enjoy it?
If there was one thing that you could change about yourself what would it be?
Name 5 things you want to do before you die?
What 5 places would you love to visit if we had the money?
Who was your favorite childhood friend? Tell of your most memrobale experience with them?
Tell me three things thaquestions to ask about communicationt you really like/love or appreciate about me.
These are just some examples, you both can ask these questions to each other. Maybe not in one setting, but you know, maybe 3 a day or something. I hope I helped a bit. Think of some questions that you can come up with.
If you are just getting around to building communication skills AFTER you're married you've got bigger problems. If you couldn't communicate you should not have gotten married to begin with. You need to stick with counseling and what your counselors instruct to "fix" your relationship
Discussing the history will do u no good instead of pain and repention. I would suggest that if u both have decided to live together then forget about the past and start anew. This will be the best way to communicate and make ur spouse realise that he was doing so wrong to to.
Waste of time and money.
All the twenty dollar words and psychobabble in the world will net change the fact he is a pig, who wabnted to bang another woman.
Get out while you can.
He will never change, take ALL his money and leave.
[1] "Honey, how do you spell "you're"? As in, "You're building your skills of yore?"
[2] You call him "the husband"? NiiiIIiiice. There's no bitterness there...
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